


The Moment I Knew

by babyholtzy



Category: NCIS
Genre: 7x24, Aftermath of Tony not being there, Angst, Other, Song fic, The Moment I Knew by Taylor Swift is so underrated, Ziva's Citizenship Ceremony, idk Ziva smokes in this one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-17
Updated: 2019-12-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:08:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21838732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babyholtzy/pseuds/babyholtzy
Summary: What happened after Tony didn't come to Ziva's citizenship ceremony. Taylor Swift song fic.
Relationships: Ziva David/Anthony DiNozzo
Kudos: 22





	The Moment I Knew

The idea for this came to me while listening to Taylor Swift’s The Moment I Knew shortly after watching NCIS 7x24, when Tony and Gibbs weren’t at Ziva’s citizenship ceremony. It’s a lil bit unrealistic but what can you do? This isn’t beta’d and I wrote it in one sitting, so sorry if she’s a bit rough. (I don’t own NCIS or the characters) 

You should’ve been there,   
Should’ve burst through the door   
With that ‘baby I’m right here’ smile.  
And it would’ve felt like   
A million little shining stars had just aligned   
And I would’ve been so   
Happy.   
_______

You call me later   
And said I’m sorry I didn’t make it.  
And I said  
I’m sorry too.

________

Ziva stood with her right hand raised, pledging her allegiance to the United States. Something which should have filled her heart with joy. Becoming a permanent American citizen means she can be a proper NCIS agent, she could finally have something permanent. The closest thing she had ever to a proper support system was the team, so why were the two seats next to her empty? Tony had promised he would be there with her. Said he wouldn’t miss it for the world. Ziva held back tears as she finished the pledge of allegiance, wondering where her number one was. 

When the ceremony was over, the Israeli shared brisk hugs with an enthusiastic Abby, Ducky, McGee, and even Palmer. The team wanted to take her for a celebratory meal, though Ziva could barely get in a full breath. She just wanted to be alone. It’s how she always ended up anyway. Alone. She quickly gave an excuse to leave, something about wanting to take a solo trip around the city as a new citizen, and rushed out. 

Pushing past others celebrating with their loved ones, she rushed to her mini and drove home. Pulling into her assigned parking space, Ziva pulled on the hand brake a little harder than necessary before covering her face with both hands and rested her head against the steering wheel. Slowly sitting up, she took in a deep breath and gathered herself enough to greet the doorman and Mrs. Harris on the way in before all but crumpling in on herself as soon as the deadbolt slid into place on her front door. 

It was only when the cold of the tiles began seeping into her bones from sitting on the floor pressed against the front door for too long Ziva furiously rubbed the tears off her cheeks and stood. She had never let one single person affect her this much. Why now and why Tony? As she walked to the fridge to grab a beer, Ziva kept reminding herself of rules 12 and 8. They were contradictory in her opinion. Number 12 is 'never date a coworker', which after witnessing the fiasco of Jenny and Gibbs’ she completely understood. Number 8, however, is 'never take anything for granted', which often reminds Ziva to appreciate the fondness, care, kindness, and love (platonic or otherwise) Tony showed her every time they spent time together in any capacity. 

Flopping down on the couch, Ziva propped her feet up on the coffee table and flicked on the TV to find a rerun of Magnum P.I. on. This, of course, restarted the stream of tears from being let down by the one person she thought never would. Turning the TV off, Ziva went to the fridge to get another beer and wandered through her apartment to her bedroom. Rummaging through her side table, she found the little box she was looking for and walked out onto her balcony, closing the sliding door behind her to keep the smell out. She would never let anyone at NCIS know she smokes, but it was really only at times like this when she needed a little release that running or boxing could not quite provide. She lit a cigarette, and took a long drag and leaned against the railing, feeling the tension leave her body. 

She stood on the balcony for an hour, her mind reeling to the broken promises. He was the one person she wanted, the one person she trusted so deeply. Midway through her next cigarette, she was broken out of her trance by the sound of her cell phone ringing from the coffee table inside. It was probably Abby checking up on her after giving her time to calm down. Putting the cigarette out on the tiles, she ducked inside to pick up her phone, vowing to not take this out on Abby.   
She picked up the phone without looking.   
‘I am fine, Abby’

Silence 

‘Abby?’ 

‘Not Abby, my little ninja’

‘Tony.’ Came her clipped reply.   
‘Uh yeah… I’m really sorry I wasn’t there Zi. Director's orders. You know how it is.’ he laughed, trying to alleviate some of the tension.

She sighed, fighting back tears. She tilted her head back and squeezed the bridge of her nose, determined not to cry. 

‘Yes Tony, I do.’ she replied, barely above a whisper, before hanging up the phone and walking back outside. 

__________

What do you do   
When the one who means the most to you   
Is the one who didn't show  
__________

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think.


End file.
